The past couple days in Knoxville has been anything but slow. Beautiful: yes. Slow: no.
I have been busy seeing people, looking for a wonderful car to buy, packing up my life, and spending lots of time with my little nephew, Cason.
Today, I found myself ending my sabbath sitting at Panera with two dear friends. (And eating the best white cheddar and beef panini you will ever eat) It was beautiful as usual. Lots of laughter, talking, remembering, and journeying into the new. And about the point where we were packing up to leave,
we had a BEAUTIFUL RUN-IN.
Very quickly I was running and embracing one of the most beautiful princesses I know. We ended up pulling up chairs and sharing little tid bits of our lives. Most people would say we were reconnecting, but I know the truth; the truth is we never disconnected (just distance in the physical). And it was as if being there was God breathing fresh life over me, inviting me to remember all he did last summer in the garden. "Remember my faithfulness."
We talked about funny camp stories. "Remember my GOOD GIFTS." And crazy God stories that involve restaurant seats and two-year-olds. "Remember I CANNOT be put in a box." but more than all that, we talked about AFRICA. Pemba, Mozambique to be specific. "Remember I give you DESIRE."
A friend is headed towards the place I love. And I literally found myself jumping up and down telling him to befriend two little boys who I love more than anything. I was so URGENT, so excited, and most of all so ALIVE. I didn't think anything of it at the time, but as I have processed the night I notice something: I feel my heart again.
Maybe it is the LOVE or maybe it is being able to dream again; all I know is I am ALIVE. and I want to LIVE and LIVE FULLY.
God is INVITING me to DREAM.
He is slowly opening up my heart again to the ALLURE OF HOPE.
God loves me and wants the BEST, the seven course meal, for me.
I wonder why I ever let go of those truths. But I did. and how I missed living in them.
And maybe, for me, God will use AFRICA to remind me that he is so so GOOD. Good and in love with his daughter, me. And when the truth of that soaks in, I cry and I feel full of hope and
dreams. I feel so full that I know I am living again.
All of that because of a God ordained run-in.
My night went on to eat yummy flat bread with hummus, and delicious brownies with coffee icing. I watched tangled for the first time. Fell in love with a cartoon character and remembered that God is good.
Not even the walls of a tower could hold the hopeful spirit of a princess in.
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